{Day 13} Real Meals Part I: The Contemplative Cook

Ridiculously amazing burgers from the summer. A rare carnivorous achievement for this mostly-vegetarian {flexitarian?} cook. 

I loved cooking until I had to cook.


When I got married, I received a beautiful array of cookbooks and I just couldn't wait to whip up gourmet deliciousness in the kitchen each night . I worked an 8-5 job and my husband was in graduate school. I had the energy that comes with early 20s {and that you totally don't appreciate at that point} and big cooking dreams.


An ambitious newlywed, I dished up everything from coq au vin to teriyaki stir-frys in my galley kitchen the size of a shoe-box. It was delightful. And really, what else did I have to do? 


Several years later I began graduate school myself. Life was sort of intense and insane and though I still cooked, we ate a lot of take-out and quick-fix stuff. But I still enjoyed cooking and baking in the kitchen...when I felt like it.


Once Blondie arrived, I made all of her baby food and still managed to cook grown-up food when I wasn't buried in books and papers. But if I didn't cook a big family dinner every evening, she didn't care. She was too busy smearing pureed sweet potatoes on the table.


Fast forward 10 years. We're a family of five and I have two boys...who will eat like grown men in just a few years. Because I homeschool, I prepare {or at least supervise} not one or two, but three meals for us each and every day. 


As soon as I clean up from breakfast, it feels like I'm pulling out the stuff for lunchtime sandwiches. As for dinner? Well, dinner has the nerve to show up every evening whether I invite her or not.


The girl who used to dream up nightly gourmet meals has become a worn-out mom who has a love / growl relationship with the kitchen. 


When cooking felt more like art, I relished it. Now that it feels more like duty, I often resent it.


To add insult to culinary injury, kid and family magazines show up in my mailbox touting grilled-cheese sandwiches in the shape of sailboats and castles made out of pancakes. You know, to make mealtime more "fun" for my kids.


Where is the magazine that shows how to make mealtime more fun for mamas? When will my kids start making risotto and rolling up some sushi for good ol' mom? 


Though I've tried meal planning approaches, I've never found a hard and fast "system" that really worked for me long-term. 


These days, I usually have ingredients for a week's worth of meals. I go to the store once or twice a week or I work with what we have. I don't stockpile a freezer because I don't have an extra freezer. My non-plan plan works okay for us and I somehow manage to have food on the table each night without feeling too much stress. 


My secret? Realistic standards and expectations. Some may call it being an underachiever but I call it not being an overachiever. 


Like a lot of real families, we don't have tremendous variety. We have a rotation of tried and true dinners and yes, sometimes that gets boring. I still love to read cookbooks for fun and I dog-ear Southern Living recipes all the time. Breaks and holidays still bring out the foodie in me and I hope that never changes.


I'm glad there are still rare occasions when cooking feels like art. And I think that one day I'll enjoy more art in the kitchen than I experience now. 


As for this season of my life, I often remind myself that I've chosen to prioritize other things and because these other good things take a lot of time and energy, I have to say no to different good things that also require time and energy. It's called opportunity cost and I've written about it before. 


Homeschool means lesson plans, teaching, and research. {And sometimes hiding under the covers and rocking back and forth in the fetal position.} I've chosen to spend the rest of my precious time writing, reading, being creative at home, or just leaving the house altogether to regain sanity.


My family still eats a reasonably healthy meal most nights and we sit at the table together. "Well-balanced" sometimes means a frozen cheese pizza, steamed broccoli and apple slices. It's not Pioneer Woman but it works for us. 


It's just one of the many ways I'm learning to accept and embrace the life we live right now. My kids are happy, fed, and loved. Sometimes {most times actually} you have to camp out in the land of just fine instead of in the pages of Bon Appetit. 


Tomorrow, I'll share a few of my own go-to meals. I've shared them before but I think we need to reintroduce them. I hope you'll share some of yours too!

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